A really good day

It's only lunch time and we've already made:

• 3 cat masks
• 3 cat tails (old tights/stockings stuffed with newspaper - suprisingly effective, vary stuffing amount and style to make all sorts of animal tails)
• 24 mini banana muffins
• 6 large banana muffins (already eaten too)

Phew!
My little cats are now watching Aristocats for 'rest time', then onwards to tea time. I've got planned:

• Dangly witch mobiles
• Clothespeg witches on drinking straw brooms
• a trip to the shops for knicker elastic to finish the cat masks.
• maybe a trip to the beach, depending on afternoon storms, etc.

This is a slightly busier than average day for us, but now you know my 'magic formula' for weight loss!

The good and the bad

The Good:
Since leaving pre-school, One-son has become calmer, more predictable, sleeps better, eats better, yawns in the middle of the day!! All indicating his poor mind and body were stressed out to the max by 3 days/week at preschool.

The Bad:
I have no respite, so conversly, I am more anxious, loose my temper more often and more spectacularly, sleep worse, feel claustrophobic, can't bear to be touched and have people in may space. All indicating my poor mind and body are now stressed to the max.

The future:
One day a week, approx 9-3pm in a mainstream daycare centre and one day a week in-home care. We should be able to start in the centre soon, but I am still hunting for a suitable in-home carer.

Long term:
A governor/governess/home tutor for all 3 of my boys, each special in their own way and likely to be ill-served by state-provided education.

ASD Support Group Meeting

The OCTOBER EVENING MEETING

- ASD Support Group –

Informal Chat and Supper

will be held this coming

Wednesday 17^th October, 7pm – 9pm

Currumbin Community Special School

Exit 95 – Stewart Rd – off the M1

(Heading SOUTH: exit from right lane)

Turn left into Currumbin Creek Road, then take the first left into Villiers Drive (Traffic Lights) and then right into Hammersford Drive into the school carpark. (Map attached)

Follow the signs to the Meeting Room!

Gold coin donation appreciated. Please bring a small plate to share for supper.

New superhero - Handy Mum!!

Introducing your new superhero on the block....

Handymum!!

My front load washing machine starting issuing distress calls around 11pm last night. At midnight I gave up the attempt to fix it, and recommenced my efforts at 9am this morning. I delved and dived in to the bowels of my washing machine and extracted.....
3 x 20c pieces!
They were blocking the drain pipe connecting the drum to the pump - needless to say it works a whole lot better without the additional parts!

Tonight, I shall be attempting to execute the instructions shown on this website : How to fix the H07 error on a Panasonic DVD player

Oh, the things we do as parents!

Yes, you CAN burn Weetbix!

My eldest decided to give mum a lie-in and prepared breakfast for all 3 boys this morning. He did a fantastic job of preparing coco bombs for himself and 'twoson'. In fact, he did just fine sorting out weetbix for 'threeson'. His only mistake was to 'warm' it in the microwave for 30 MINUTES instead of 30 seconds!!!

The picture is what was left of the weetbix plus bowl after approx. 15 mins in a 1000W microwave! As the warning goes, 'Folks, don't try this at home'.

Just over an hour later, the house still stinks. I will be preparing a 'recipe' later to be stuck to the kitchen wall in a prominent position to cue 'oneson' through the process of making weetbix successfully in future!

The 'recipe' will take the form of a simple photographic story with simple sentences. I may also turn this in to his first 'social script' book. Most folks with ASD kids will be familiar with the type of thing I mean.

Yes, I did eventually remember to praise and congratulate 'oneson' on his excellent caring behaviour towards his siblings this morning (after the smoke had cleared sufficiently to breath without coughing).

Carer-Connect Information Workshop

When: Wednesday 3 October 2007

Where: not advised in the email or attached info – please check when you register

Time: 10.00 A.M. to 11.30 A.M Morning tea will be served from 9.30 A.M.

To register: Call Carers Queensland Gold Coast office on 07 5522 6244 by Monday 1 October ‘07

quote for the day

"I only do my autism when I have sticky tape over my mouth"

uh-hu, righty-oh, must remember to throw all my sticky tape away and cure my son's autism ;-)

ASD Support Group 5.9.07 COFFEE'N'CHAT MORNING

The SEPTEMBER Coffee’n’Chat

ASD Support Group Morning Tea

will be held this coming

Wednesday 5^th September, 10am - 12noon

Currumbin Community Special School

Exit 95 – Stewart Rd – off the M1 (exit from right lane)

Turn left into Currumbin Creek Road, then take the first left (traffic lights) into Villiers Drive and then right into Hammersford Drive into the school carpark. (Map attached)

Upon arrival, please sign in at the school’s Administration Office,

where you will be shown where our meeting is held.

Expelled from daycare/preschool

Completely out of the blue our special guy has been expelled from his private preschool/daycare centre for being 'violent and aggressive with peers and staff'. We are shocked, bewildered, devastated, angry...

As far as we know he has become slightly rougher over the past few weeks - pushing and shoving, mostly. As mentioned in a previous post, as far as we're concerned this is his autistic response to their staff changes. He certainly isn't anywhere near as bad as he was when he first went there.

In fact, it was all the more shocking because I have been celebrating just how well he's been doing at home. His behaviour at the stables on the weekend and at my best friend's house with her two boys was just superb - yes, squeeling, hand flappping and toe running, but no violence beyond the usual push and shove of 5 year old friends and siblings.

Anyway, here we sit, with no family near by to help out to give us any respite and no daycare (we live in an area where there's more demand than supply for daycare places). He's not 'bad enough' to qualify for special education placement. He's not 'normal enough' to cope in mainstream.

Please Help

If you'd like to help, visit my business team's blog post
We are not asking for charity. We'd like you to help by taking the opportunity my business team offers to help yourself.

Not only do I want to hire a teacher to 'home educate' this bright special boy, but I want to seek peers - a group of up to half a dozen - who are also falling through the crack - shunned from mainstream, but not severe enough to qualify for special school.

Having fixed the immediate educational and social needs of my son, I then want to continue to grow and build the first fully self-funding specialist school for autistic and ADHD right here on the Gold Coast, Queensland, Australia. I don't know what form this will take yet - traditional school with grounds and building, or non-traditional small groups being 'home schooled' with a private fully qualified teacher, or some other solution I haven't even thought of yet.

There are schools for Autistics in the area, but they are private, fee paying schools. One is to be built soon - fees AFTER government assistance are expected to be in the order of AUD$12,000 per year per child.

I want a totally different system where the fees are $0!

So once again,
Please Help
visit my business team's blog post

IQ Testing for Autistic People

This article is an absolutely fascinating read:
The Puzzle of Hidden Ability

We have been debating the issue of appropriate schooling for all our kids, but especially our special guy, who will start school next year. We are aware he has strengths and weaknesses and I tabled the idea that we should pick a school strong in his weak areas to 'balance him out', figuring if we can give him a bit of extra support and work, his weak areas will improve.

The above article gives a different opinion (it's main thrust is that 'standard tests' are not always appropriate and don't always give meaningful answers). On the subject of strengths, and whether to focus on the weak areas in an autistic person's abilities, the article says:

Dawson, who is autistic, thinks that's a prescription for intellectual failure; autistics should be encouraged to build on their strengths, as everyone else is.

I have to say, put like that, I agree. My middle boy is gifted with language and imagination, so to choose an appropriate school for him I am inclined to select one strong in English and Arts, to match him. Yet, for my Autistic boy, my thinking was 'he's weak in social skills, so perhaps we should find a school strong in community and social aspects, such as a Steiner school'.

Frankly, it may already be too late to seek enrollment at a private school for next year. I am still inclined to chuck in the local State School and see how he fares. Likely, he'll suprise us all yet again.

Hmmm.... more contemplation required.

Those autistic moments...

My special chap's going through another of his more autistic phases - just like my mood varies from day to day, his demonstration of autistic behaviours is greater on some days than others.

Preschool noticed a couple of weeks ago he was becoming overly rough and aggressive again. We noticed last Saturday as the meds wore off at the park - the hands came up, tucked tight against the shoulders... then they began to flap... then he got up on his toes, and finally the whole performance began - running on toes in tight circles, squeeling and flapping his hands. He was totally out of control.

The degree of severity and the frequency of such behaviour has been much higher than average since Saturday. The mornings are worst - neither myself nor my hubby are morning people, and the squeeling is worst then. There's been a couple of mornings we've sent him out in to the garden and closed the door while we BREATH (and drink tea/coffee). Watching him and his youngest brother (almost 2) standing nose to nose having a squeeling contest would be amusing if it wasn't 6am in a small suburban house.

I was at a loss for the trigger. I decided it must just be another little phase - he's a bit like shares on the stock market - he goes up, he comes down, but the over all trend is currently up.

Then it hit me like a ton of bricks - how could I be so dumb?! Reading the newletter from his preschool informing me of all the staff changes that have been going on for the past 2 weeks.

Well, That'll do it!!

So, when I went to pick him up yesterday, I pointed it out to the staff there - reminded them yet again HE'S AUTISTIC - any change will have unpredictable behavioural consequences, ESPECIALLY because no one has thought to sit down and help him adjust his mental script by talking to him about all the changes!

Fingers crossed for today.....

FABIC - Developing a Conducive Environment for an ASD Person

This training course is coming up in September

Target group:

Parents, teachers and carers of people who have Autism Spectrum Disorder

Objectives:

A person with ASD can find their daily environment challenging. When the environment is challenging for any person their level of anxiety is likely to increase, resulting in some form of behavioural deterioration. This programme is designed to assist those who work with an ASD person to become aware of and modify common environmental challenges. As a result the ASD person will be less anxious and therefore less behavioural deteriorations will occur.

Throughout this programme participants will learn:

¨ To identify common environmental challenges an ASD person faces on a daily bases

¨ That behavioural deterioration is often the person’s only means of managing these challenging situations.

¨ How to develop a favourable environment in which a person with ASD will be less anxious and therefore can function more effectively

Topics Covered:

¨ Anxiety, ASD & behavioural deterioration

¨ Sequence of behaviour

¨ Functions of behaviour

¨ Identifying common challenging situations to which an ASD person is likely to be exposed

¨ Identifying when intervention is required

Programme Details:

This programme is run over four 1½ -hour sessions. There is a limit to 8 people per group. The next programme will be held:

Session	Day	Date	Time
1	Monday	10th September 2007	6.30pm to 8.00pm
2	Monday	17th September 2007	6.30pm to 8.00pm
3	Monday	24th September 2007	6.30pm to 8.00pm
4	Monday	01st October 2007	6.30pm to 8.00pm

Cost:

$264.00 (including GST) for all four sessions

Contact details

Tan Curtis

Clinical Behaviour Manager & Counsellor

Assoc Dip Ed (Child Care), BHlthSci.(BehMgt), MBehMgt, MCoun

Suite 34 Medical Centre

Worongary Shopping Village

1 Mudgeeraba Road (exit 77 off the Pacific Highway)

Worongary QLD 4213

55 905 099 or 0412 615 798

tancurtis@fabic.com.au

www.fabic.com.au

Their cute little ways

This post http://momnos.blogspot.com/2007/08/how-do-you-say-adorable.html
got me thinking.

My ASD fella doesn't have many cute ways of saying things - he has a huge vocabulary, mostly correctly pronounced. Fluency is his problem - so a whole sentence can take several run-ups with a few stops and starts and often an impatient mother saying "So, are you going to finish that sentence?". Often, he fails to finish his sentences - the thought is long gone and he's on to the next thing.

It's No.2Son that has all the cute ways of saying things. He is finally growing out of having 'axe-dig-a-nents' (accidents) and calls his older brother by his proper name instead of 'damn-em' and he now eats spaghetti instead of 'pass-ghetti'.

No.3Son is starting with few, but nothing too distinctive yet. He way of saying 'yi' for yes is very cute.

inspirational quote

"Parents are the hardest-working members of the population. But they do it for the highest wages. Kisses."

- Pete Seeger

Hmm, not sure I feel the same way right now, but I most of the time I'd agree, the 'pay' is worth it.

Upcoming workshop with Prof Tony Attwood

This has been sent out to Autism GC from Asperger Services Australia who are a parent network in Brisbane.

2 Day Workshop for

SPOUSES AND PARTNERS

PSYCHOLOGIST, COUNSELLORS

Co-presenters:

Prof Tony Attwood

CLINICAL PSYCHOLOGIST

Specialising in Asperger’s Syndrome

and

Dr Isabelle Henault

CLINICAL PSYCHOLOGIST

ASD Specializing in Relationships and Sexual Relationships

Saturday 1st September & Sunday 2nd September 2007

9.00 am to 3.00 pm

Queensland Rugby Club BALLYMORE (BRISBANE)

Hi All

Just a quick reminder that we still have a few seats left for the Two

Day Spouses and Partners workshop on the weekend 1 & 2 September.

We have just learned that Commonwealth Carer Respite and Carelink Centre

will fund or partly fund the seminar fees if required. Please contact

Commonwealth Carer Respite and Carelink Centre on 1800 059 059 for more

information.

Kind regards

Stefanie

A4 Newsletter - Autism Aspergers Advocacy Australia

Get your hands on the latest nation-wide news from A4

http://www.a4.org.au/documents/updates/A4-2007-Update04.pdf

Vaccancies on Mothers Weekend Away

Hi Ladies

Due to illness, there are some places still available on this weekend’s Mothers’ Weekend Away!

If you just happen to be interested in coming along and can organise it at short notice, please ring myself 0417 700 190 or Debra 5508 2364 asap.

We are due to arrive up at Tamborine Lodge from 5pm tomorrow afternoon. Dinner is at 6pm.

We are having lots of Rest and Relaxation while up at Tamborine Mountain, and will look to come home after lunch on Sunday afternoon whenever you are ready to! You will need to drive yourself up there or check with Helen or Debra to see if a lift can be arranged.

See Snowcake the movie - support Austism Gold Coast Inc

Autism Gold Coast Inc &

Gold Coast Arts Centre

present a fundraising screening of

http://www.snowcakemovie.co.uk/ http://www.snowcakemovie.co.uk/trailer.php

rated M

starring Alan Rickman, Sigourney Weaver, Carrie-anne Moss

Monday 13th August 2007

6:40pm

Gold Coast Arts Centre, Bundall

Tickets at the Door: $12.00

SNOW CAKE is a story of love and friendship and the unorthodox relationship between a man escaping his past, an autistic mother coping with the loss of her daughter and a passionate woman who keeps love at arm's length.

All funds raised from this event will go towards Autism Gold Coast Inc projects. Autism Gold Coast Inc is a volunteer not-for-profit organisation, a registered charity with deductible gift recipient status. Autism Gold Coast Inc supports parents, families and carers of people diagnosed with Autism, Asperger’s Syndrome, Autism Spectrum Disorder.

We look forward to your support and patronage at this fundraising event.

Together we CAN make a difference in the lives of people

with an Autism Spectrum Disorder!

Support Services Mini Expo - August 2007

Date Claimer

Support Services Mini Expo 2007

for

Students with Disabilities

in

Transition from School to Post School Life

Monday 13 August

5.00-7.30pm

Broadbeach State School

James Centre

(Old Burleigh Rd Broadbeach)

Exhibition Categories

Accommodation

Advocacy

Aids and Equipment

Citizenship

Educational Support

Financial

Health and Well-being

Information Services

Respite Services

Specific Disability Support Services

Support Groups

Transport

Autism Gold Coast Inc will be in attendance and have a table display.

This is a low-key event with the emphasis on information sharing and networking

Good Days

Yes, actually, we do have good days. Today was one particularly shining example!

We have spent the day with a friend of mine who has two boys of similar age to my older 2. All three of my boys adore the eldest of hers and there have been repeated calls to go visit for days. Today we went and all FIVE boys played, and played, and played.

We sat and drank tea and discussed business. The kids got on with being kids and making a huge mess, but there was almost NO fighting! Only one incident the whole day and my eldest special guy coped just fine and did not get excessively aggressive given the provocation.

We cooked sausages on the barbeque.

We went to the park and fed the fish and the sea gulls and the four eldest played on the roundabout.

We came home with tired, but happy kids.

HAPPY PARENTS!

Moving to a big bed - End of an era

My littlest fella is spending his first night in a proper bed tonight. It's a trundle bed, so when he falls out, it's only 10" to the floor. He'll be frightened and upset, but not hurt (well, maybe his pride).

I used a proper big bed for my first born and a rolled up heavy wool blanket under the sheet as an 'edge' to stop him falling out (worked pretty well and didn't cost anything, unlike a proper bed barrier, also easy to replicate if away from home), but learnt from that and used a trundle for child #2. No need for any kind of barrier, and no fear about falling out. He fell out twice and that was that.

This is the end of the 'baby era' in my house. The previous two occasions I've moved kids into 'big beds' I've been in a hurry to free up the cot for the next one! This time, I can take it down and move it on to another home. No more babies. Yes, I'm a little sad, a bit clucky, etc. But I'm also happy, relieved and can see the light at the end of the tunnel. So I recognise and honour all my feelings, and then we'll be moving right along...

The next era begins in January - I will become a 'school mum' as my eldest goes to school, age 5.5yrs.

Sweet Dreams

I should publish my woes here more often! After my last post, my eldest has had a few (relatively) good night's sleep!

I'm sure that Dad being away on business last week contributed greatly to the Autistic Week from hell, in which my eldest had high frequency night waking, night mares and night terrors, and by day was unable to concentrate, and exhibited a lot of his 'self stimulating' behaviour (stuff like the squeeling and the hand flapping).

Poor Dad just can't win - when he goes away, my boy is obviously disturbed, but also rises to the occasion, being helpful and taking charge of his younger brothers (sometimes when NOT required or appropriate!). When Dad comes home, my boy yells at him "Shoe Fly, Shoe!!" (he learnt this phrase to mean 'go away' around 2.5 - 3 yrs of age from the song 'shoe fly, don't bother me, shoe fly, don't bother me, shoe fly don't bother me, coz I don't need no company' and has used it ever since to tell people to go away and stop bothering him, particularly when he's under stress).

Dad has learnt to deal with his odd little boy. Instead of taking it all to heart and being hurt and angry, Dad asked me to have the other two while he took our eldest fishing, for quality time.

Things are pretty much back on track now and settling nicely - both sleep and behaviour patterns are about 'normal' for our special guy.

So, it's true - "This too, shall pass"

The Nightmare nightmare

Yep, the nightmares are back in town.

From the age of about 2yrs to about 4yrs, my eldest had nightmares at 10:30pm and night terrors at 2am. Nothing we could do. Then, for no reason we ever worked out, the frequency began to decrease. By about 4.5yrs old, he still woke around 10:30 every night, but settling was much easier, and the 2am wake was largely gone altogether. Everyone was much happier (he used to scream so much he woke everyone except himself).

Now, they're back. Can't say I've missed them. Thankfully, it seems to be only from about 9:30pm to midnight, and only nightmares. But every night! We are all looking haggard. Poor chap remembers having 'bad dreams' but can't remember what about.

We've banned all potentially scary TV and movies (not that this seems to help). So frustrating. I've Googled and read, and it seems there is nothing to do except wait for them to pass again and cope as best we can in the meantime.

What to tell my child about himself??

I added my first poll this morning. I am curious to know what other people think on the issue, but it probably won't change what I think and do about it. Here's what sparked it all off:

This morning, my special bundle of joy was up to his usual tricks - ones that all ASD parents are likely to be familiar with, namely:

• The high pitch squeel and random vocalisations
• Flapping hands held close to his shoulders
• Running round on tiptoe, at high speed with no regard for safety of self or others
  
• Complete non-compliance with any request to do anything because he just couldn't stay focused and had to resort to one or all of the above.

The result was 2 little brothers copying him and a mum tearing her hair out trying to get them all fed, washed, dressed and off to kindy.

In the end, I physically stopped my eldest, held him infront of my by the shoulders and told him outright "These behaviours are NOT normal; your friends don't do them! If you don't want to be teased, you need to learn to control yourself!". His reply?
"I know. My friends do tease me" to which I responded "Well, your real friends won't tease you, but some people will. That's just the way the world is and if you don't want to be teased, don't give them things to tease you about!".

Then I explained calmly "You are different. I don't fully understand 'how', and there is no 'why', but that's just the way it is. You were born different. This is not a bad thing - life would be dull if we were all the same. However, sometimes you're going to have to behave just the same as everyone else."

So, what do you think? Right approach to teach them they are different? Does this encourage them to understand themselves and others better? Or wrong approach? Does telling them just encourage them to be more separate from the world and to not even try to understand others?

a spoonful of sugar

I am enjoying the benefits of alternative healthcare so much that I wanted to extend treatment to my kids too. However, as anyone can tell you, naturopathic herbal remedies taste disgusting! There's no way to disguise it, hide it, or otherwise deceive someone in to taking it. I've tried bribing the kids with lollies - this tactic is enough to gain co-operation with most things horrible - to no avail.

In the end, I asked my naturopath. Did I really have to put the remedy in a WHOLE glass of juice/water and get them to drink it ALL??

The answer is simply NO. Here are the alternatives:

• The dilution is just for pallitability - the medicines taste worse the more concentrated they are. So, use the minimum you think necessary. This morning, I managed to get away with 1ml of 'potion' and 4mls of water, followed, of course, by a lolly to get rid of the taste.
• Mix the 'potion' with honey to make a syrup and administer that way. I tried this at lunch time. Tastes like cough mixture, but went down successfully. The after-taste of the medicine was so strong though, even I resorted to a lolly!

Wishing you all the very best of health!

PS - "lollies" here in Aus doesn't mean lollipops - it refers to all kinds of candy and sweets.

The Dreaded First Post

OK, I'm going to get through this using the '6 W's' approach to essay writing taught to me in High School English. The 6 W's being: What? Where? When? Why? Who? HoW?

What?
This blog is intended for my thoughts and feelings regarding being a mother. A place to share all my joy, frustration, success, funny moments, tips, tricks, stuff I wish someone had told me, etc. It could end up containing just about anything. In particular, I will attempt to break the isolation that I sometimes feel in raising a 'not quite normal, ever so special' little chap. He has officially earned a label that places him on the Autistic Spectrum and he shows elements of hyperactivity (he hasn't been actually labelled ADHD.... yet, but he is certainly more active than 'normal', and as a result of this and his ASD has a different 'Attention pattern' than 'normal').

Where?
Right here in cyberspace. Geographically, somewhere in Australia in the suburbs of a large city.

When?
Who knows? I could be setting myself just another task I don't have time for... time will tell. Basically, whenever I feel so inspired.

How?
erm... the usual method for blog posting in blogger.

Who?
Just little ol' me. Those that know me and my family will be able to figure it out, I'm sure, but I don't intend identifying myself or my kids for those that don't, simply because it's not fair on the kids. Just think, here I am spilling my guts with amusing tales of kiddy goings-on and in a few years' time, my kids are happily at school until one day, one of their darling little friends finds this blog.....

Why?
Just reaching out, really. In all probability, the only people who will read it are my friends and family whom I tell about it, but it still helps give the illusion of connecting to others 'out there'. It gives me somewhere to put it all, much like an old fashioned journal or diary. However, it has the added bonus of allowing others to search for any shared experience they my find useful.